Just when you think your wife's body could not become any more dynamic or miraculous, she begins the dreaded change: menopause. If you ever needed a handbook, it would be during your wife's menopause. As if hot flashes and mood swings are not enough, your well-intended offers of comfort and advice may earn you a spot on the couch for the night. What is a man to do? Thankfully, there are ways to cope with your wife's menopause that will ease her transition. A little understanding goes a long way.
Defined
By medical definition, menopause is simply the one-year anniversary of your wife's last menstrual period. In her mind, it is the very day she becomes old. Of course, this is not the case. Most women enter menopause between the ages of 45 and 55, which is not old by any means. Menopause also marks the day that she will never again bear a child. Even if she did not particularly want children, the option was there until the one year anniversary of her last menstrual period.
Peri-Menopause
It is a common misconception that women just begin to experience symptoms during menopause. Hormone levels begin to rise and fall long before menopause occurs. Your wife may experience symptoms as early as her mid-30s. If you notice that your wife's menstrual periods are becoming less predictable, and she complains of mysterious symptoms such as hot flashes, dry skin, or excess hair, she might be peri-menopausal.
Mood
The most obvious manifestation of menopause from a man's perspective, is your wife's abrupt changes in mood. One minute she is happy, the next she is crying. Before you can grab her a tissue, she is irate. Her hormonal levels rise and fall faster than her mood. Beyond that, she is experiencing external changes that can effect her mood. Estrogen levels are depleting and being replaced by the male hormone testosterone, which is almost foreign to her body. This causes her youthful skin to become lax and discolored. She might develop new wrinkles. Some women consider this as a loss of beauty. As with any loss, this must be grieved. There is no predictable response to loss of youth, so allow your wife to grieve in her own way. Do not insult her by suggesting that she is just hormonal, and her point is invalid. Listen to her complaints, and try to remember how you felt during puberty. Menopause is rather like a second puberty that no one prepares you for.
Sex
Most menopausal women feel less than desirable. Your job is to help her appreciate her changed body by letting her know that you appreciate it. Make a point to tell her how you can hardly keep your hands off of her, and that she is beautiful. Take her on dates so she knows how badly you want to show her off. Let her initiate the act of sex. Now is not the time to push this issue. If she wants to have sex, have lubrication on hand. Many women experience vaginal dryness during and after menopause which can make intercourse painful. Some women find post-menopausal sex liberating because there is no fear of pregnancy.
Tags: your wife, experience symptoms, last menstrual, last menstrual period, menstrual period, rise fall, Some women
