If you have known someone who found a lump under her arm or on her breast, then you have seen the fear. However, if you found the lump, then you know the many thoughts that pervade your mind as you contemplate the possibility of breast cancer being the diagnosis. You hope for it to be something else, but you know if it is breast cancer, death is a real possibility. Everyone will tell you not to worry or panic, but that is not always possible for some people.
Laurel Discovers a Lump
Laurel found a rather large, painful lump under her right arm. She had generally lumpy breasts all her life, with no history of breast cancer in the family as far as she was aware. At over 44 years old, she had never had a mammogram or really examined herself. Her husband encouraged her to go to the doctor, who found an additional lump and told her to schedule a mammogram.
With no medical coverage, the mammogram was more than $300. Her sister instructed her to get an ultrasound done at the same time and ask around for a better price.
Contemplation While Waiting
The earliest Laurel could get in to a lower-priced facility was more than a month away, but she would be able to get both the mammogram and ultrasound for $320 at a radiology imaging center. While waiting, Laurel worked at remaining in a good mood. The doctor told her not to worry, and she was trying. Every so often, however, she would suddenly break down and cry as the thought of dying before her daughter's wedding came to mind. She tried to stop thinking about the things she would miss, but that was extremely difficult since she genuinely enjoyed life.
The fear of having to go through invasive surgery and chemotherapy periodically gripped her thoughts as well. She would tell herself that it would be okay--everything happens for a reason, and maybe something good would come of this situation.
Laurel breathed a sigh of relief when the diagnosis was benign fibroglandular tissue, with instructions to have another mammogram in six months to reevaluate for cancer.
Christina's Story
Christina was diagnosed with breast cancer a day before her 41st birthday, just one week after her fourth child was born. Her doctor scheduled surgery--a bi-lateral mastectomy and reconstructive surgery, which was done at the same time. The surgery took place one month later, six days before Christmas, and was successful, with no cancer found in the lymph nodes. The cancer was stage two as the lump was three centimeters, meaning that chemotherapy would follow once she recovered from surgery. This began one month later; radiation wasn't necessary since the surgeon was able to remove everything.
Help From Church, Friends and Family
The outpouring of help from Christina's friends and family was overwhelming for her, since she was always a capable individual. However, surgery after having a baby, along with chemotherapy, proved to be extremely draining and weakening. With her strength completely sapped, Christina could only watch as church members took turns bringing meals, doing laundry and tending to the children. Aunts from other states adopted the youngest daughter for a few weeks at a time.
Christmastime and the months to come filled up with a strange mixture of charity and fun, as the "hairdressers" lopped off locks, gave her a "Mohawk," tried on wigs while they baked cookies, and changed and burped the baby.
Feelings
Christina is a Christian and struggled with wanting to be strong, not wanting to admit her hatred of the disease and the horrible side effects of the chemo and drugs. She didn't want to tell her friends that her husband had to carry her to the car for her chemo treatments because she didn't want to go. She later wrote in her public journal that a Christian video her children were watching caused a heart of gratefulness to emerge. She was glad to be with her children, more in love with her husband, and appreciative of friends and family. She began to be thankful to her God for an eternal promise of life, even though this moment in time was frightening and painful.
It took only six months from Christina's diagnosis to the final chemotherapy treatment. At the time, she felt it would never end. Now, two years cancer-free, it is becoming a distant memory.
Tags: breast cancer, didn want, done same, done same time, found lump, from Christina
